i'm so sleepy

i’m so sleepy i can barely keep my head up

my eyelids feel like they weigh as much as 1000 cars

but they glide over my eyeballs as if they’re weightless

they act slow

with each blink another car is added

maybe this time something heavier

sleep is the only drug that mends instead of breaking

it doesn’t ruin your marriage or strain a relationship with your kids

just the ability to tighten your head on your shoulder

like it also acts as its own screw driver

sleep tightends the screws in your neck

holds your head upright, keeps your world from rattling loose

lack there of means looser screws and sometimes they fall out

sleep isn’t completely harmless

without it, you result to other means

like the drugs that can ruin your marriage or strain the relationship with your kids

you result to the little white tablets with names too long to pronounce

but dangerously easy to use

for a while you think you become dependent on the need for sleep

the need to have that feeling of the cars on your eyelids

the need to have that feeling you get when your head crashes into a soft and silken pillow

the need to waste a day away doing nothing

but then it stops being that

you no longer become addicted to the need for such innocent feelings

but addicted to the need for what causes them

it goes past the benzodiazepines and alprazolam

and when it goes past those

you have now went past the amount of time you’ve given yourself on this earth